Tuesday, October 9, 2012

You have woman hips

Yeah.  Not exactly what you want to hear from your doctor.  Ok, maybe that wasn't exactly what he said but given my wonderfully supportive and understanding wife, that's what it's been twisted in to.

Those of you that know me well know that I have taken up running in the last few months.  Why?  I don't know.  I used to run a lot but after high school all came to a screeching halt.  You know, there was partying, studying, work, marriage, kids blah blah blah.  Life in general happened.  Well my wife suggested I run a 5K run here in Tulsa and my good friend agreed to run it with me.  I started training.  One mile at first, then two.  It wasn't long before 3 miles didn't sound so bad.  I ran the 5K without any issues and it felt great.  Running is like a bad addiction.  I'm to the point now that a half marathon doesn't sound that bad.  It's a vicious cycle. 

My training was going very well until a couple of weeks ago when my knee started hurting.  Great, just what I need. A reminder that I'm not 18 any more.  Through some good advice from family, friends and my current doctors, I found a doctor in town that specializes in treating runners and running injuries.  Today was my first visit with him.  It was an hour long evaluation and a 30 minute treatment.  But let's not get ahead of myself.

First thing was a quick run around the parking lot.  He filmed me from every different angle you can imagine.  We came back in and he watched me walk, did all sorts of functional movement tests etc. etc. The entire time he was looking at me I would just hear him say.  

"Wow, that's cool." or
"Can I take a picture of this for one of my blogs or Facebook posts?"

Apparently I'm quite the specimen, in a really wonked up kind of way.  I'm not going to pretend to know all the medical terms for the problems I have but here is the synopsis.  I have a problem with my hips that he frequently sees in women.  Something about the angle at which my leg bone comes out of my hip.  It twists my entire leg in a weird fashion.  To compensate of course, my lower leg bones are twisted as well.  That's pretty awesome because the end result is that my feet are pointed out, not forward like they should be.  My hips also tilt forward instead of being level.  That apparently isn't correct either.

All that is really pretty irrelevant because my lovely wife latched on to "I have woman hips".  He did some treatments on me to start correcting some of my problems.  Then he shaved my leg, taped them and my foot up and sent me on my way.  The issues certainly aren't resolved but I feel like I'm working with someone who understands what I am going through and feels like he can help me work through it.  

My supportive wife was of course peeing herself while I was telling her about my visit.  Thanks honey.  Love you too.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012


That's the only word I can think of to describe my mental state this evening.

Let me say this, I want nothing more than for my children to be strong willed and independent people who can think for themselves and not be afraid to voice their opinions.  That being said, I also expect them to be respectful and polite, ESPECIALLY to their elders.  There in lies the basis of my exasperation.

My daughter is going to turn 5 years old in about a month.  Maybe.  Recently we have been struggling with her attitude.  It is pretty clear that I have a strong willed girl on my hands, which is good, we have just been unable to figure out how to mold that will into the upstanding citizen we expect.  I know, she's only five.  My fear is that if she acts like this now, she is destined to be one of THOSE adults.  That is simply not an option.

She has had a lot happen to her in the last couple of years.  First of all she went from the only child, to one of three.  In addition she moved up to a "Big Girl" school.  She started pre-k in August.  Every day the school sends home every kid with a Green, Red or Yellow to indicate how they behaved that day.  She seems to go through stages of green followed by a streak of yellow and sometimes even red.  Since returning to school after the Christmas break, she has had more yellows than greens.  Not only that, but the infractions seem to be getting worse.  Today she received a yellow for being mean to her friends and bossing the teachers around.  Seriously?  Bossing the teachers?  And not only that but the teacher told me she had several warnings before being moved to yellow and after being moved to yellow she continued to act up.  Apparently she was on the verge of red.  WTH?!?!?!?!

After we came home this evening the antics continued.   After she was allowed to come down stairs, we all sat down at the table for dinner.  We were talking about how she had acted today and I said something to her, I can't even remember what it was.  I probably can't remember because I had a small aneurism when she repeated what I said in her best 2 year old mocking voice.  I seriously wanted to reach across the table and slap her lips off of her face.  That resulted in a time out, and my wife laughing at me when the 4 year old was out of earshot.  I pointed out that it probably wouldn't be so funny had it happened to her.

After dinner, she was playing with her brothers.  I walked around the corner just in time to see her kick the crap out of her brother.  She just walked up behind him and kicked him.  Back to time out followed by a shower and straight to bed.

So here we are.  All the kids are in bed but I still have heartburn.  I try to tell myself that she's only 5 and this is just a phase, but I am terrified that we will not be able to get this attitude problem under control.  I don't want my child to be THAT teenager/adult.  You know the ones, those people you would like to punch in the face on a regular basis.  Why don't these damn things come with a manual?

I think i'm going to go have a drink.